I’ll try something new and sit back and enjoy the view. Because in this case, this IS my circus, and these ARE my monkeys, and they are a rollicking good time!
Motherhood
In the Silence
And it dawns on me. The lesson. These things happen sometimes when something someone says intrigues me so, that I want to ponder it, mull it over, hold it in my hand and carry it like a talisman until its wisdom breaks open for me.
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Sunshine, Food and Medicine for the Soul
"Flowers always make people better, happier, and more helpful, they are sunshine, food and medicine for the soul." ~ Luther Burbank Oh, Spring is just around the corner - technically next weekend. We are seeing bright green grass in our field and these lovely daffodils are in full bloom over at my mother-in-law's house. I … Continue reading Sunshine, Food and Medicine for the Soul
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Learning to Laugh
Always the lists. Give me too much free time between calls at work, and a fairly slow day with no nearby neighbors to visit with, and I used pages and pages of scratch paper to make lists for the New Year. Lists about working out, and menus, and lists of chores and how to rotate … Continue reading Learning to Laugh
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The Stories of our Lives
It all started with Harold & the Purple Crayon. My youngest and I read the story together in front of a blazing fire and he said he wanted to have this book in his collection someday when he grows up and moves out. I told him he would need his own copy because there are … Continue reading The Stories of our Lives
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Imagining Pictures in the Clouds
My boys and I see pictures in the sky. We see big, bold, ridiculous, pictures sometimes, and we laugh and point. This is beginner imagination building that we have been doing since they were tiny. Now, they can create a story out of thin air. (The picture here looks a little like Olive Oil, from … Continue reading Imagining Pictures in the Clouds
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Mothers
The conflict happens because she’s right and she loves you. And yet, we strive against all her rightness, her great ideas, Her prodding us into things that challenge and define us. She made memories for us, with the books she read us, The games she played, the places she took us, The worlds … Continue reading Mothers
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We could Hug More!
Another bad thing in a world of bad things. I have not become numb, that is not what has happened. I crumble with each new attack, with each new assault - foreign or domestic. And then I disconnect, and block out the media, and become absorbed in my kids' interests and the activities we can do … Continue reading We could Hug More!
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Sugar Sweet
It seems I have been struggling under a delusion that if I could just get my house organized Once and For All, everything would stay put. But it is more insipid than that - there is a strand of Once and For All twirling all through my head. If I could nail down my belief … Continue reading Sugar Sweet
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Inhabit
"At this point in his life, he hadn't started inhabiting his work, like he did later."
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Pre-Pubescent Insanity
I wish anyone had been able to explain these changes to me as a young person. I just thought I was crazy. It's all perfectly normal. It's absolutely completely normal to hit pre-puberty and feel like all is lost and you have no grip on reality.
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Right Brain, Left Bank and Parenting through Teenage Angst
Being on the right side of the brain is a little like being on the Left Bank in Paris: relaxing while watching the passing show, listening to the music on the corner. It's a place to sit around and tell stories and wonder about it all - and most important, to slow down. Call … Continue reading Right Brain, Left Bank and Parenting through Teenage Angst
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Easy, Now, Grasshopper!
It's Tao Tuesday! As always, I will refer you back to the original page, Tao te Ching Daily, and her series, Tao Tuesday. There, you will find rich discussion and articles from every chapter of the Tao, spanning I think a couple of years. I'm just starting over here, and relishing the discipline of looking … Continue reading Easy, Now, Grasshopper!
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On Motherhood, Physics and Relativity
Today, while doing chores, I listened to a book on tape from the library called, "How the Universe got its Spots." (This is a link to the Amazon book, because I couldn't link to the book on tape for some reason.) The gifted young cosmologist Janna Levin sets out to determine the size of the … Continue reading On Motherhood, Physics and Relativity
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Let the Whole Thing Flower
Katagiri Roshi says, "Our goal is to have kind consideration for all sentient beings every moment forever." This does not mean put a good poem on paper and then spit at our lives, curse our cars, and cut off someone on the freeway. It means carry the poem away from the desk and into … Continue reading Let the Whole Thing Flower
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Lessons in Learning
Let me preface by saying that after writing today's reflection, I feel raw because of how much I have to learn. This motherhood thing is ever changing, constant learning, every day more to understand about ourselves and therefore how we parent. I choose to keep thinking that every day I am trying to be better, … Continue reading Lessons in Learning
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Balance – That Damned Word
Tao Te Ching - Chapter 74 - with Reflection If you realize that all things change, there is nothing you will try to hold on to. If you aren't afraid of dying, there is nothing you can't achieve. Trying to control the future is like trying to take the master carpenter's place. When you … Continue reading Balance – That Damned Word
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I Run Along Beneath You
If I could see what you see; the finished project from a pile of scraps. The angles and lines and tiny details, wheels within wheels that leap from your mind; the magic you create. I run along beneath you as you soar - holding ropes or guide lines. Trying to offer some balance; tiny morsels … Continue reading I Run Along Beneath You
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Constantly Knocking Over the Teacups
I started to say that whenever we have a day where I feel like I've given my absolute best, I've poured everything I have into this mothering gig, and really done a bang up job, that's when my kids act out and get crazy and I end up becoming unravelled by bedtime... I started … Continue reading Constantly Knocking Over the Teacups
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Pot. Kettle. Black.
Yesterday, I tuned into the radio just in time to hear the announcer say the title of the previous song, "Pot. Kettle. Black," and it stuck with me the rest of the day. The old saying wound itself through my thoughts all afternoon. The point it kept making in my head was that there is … Continue reading Pot. Kettle. Black.
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Bittersweet: The Thud of Pulsing Grief in My Mommy Heart
In my own way, I revered the children lost today by holding my children tonight and laughing together at dinner. At some point during the weekend, I will have to introduce them to the idea of the tragedy that happened today in Connecticut, just not yet. Not yet. For tonight, they are sleeping soundly without sadness. … Continue reading Bittersweet: The Thud of Pulsing Grief in My Mommy Heart
